THE Gynocratic Art Gallery

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I Want to Die in Upstate New York

I Want to Die in Upstate New York


I want to die in Upstate New York

Somewhere in the Adirondacks

Fixed loosely in nature

I want to look out at a pastel sunset

Setting over the moutains

In cool sweeping blues and pinks

Rich in evergreen

I want to hover over the Fulton Chain Lakes

I want to live my life like a Jackson Pollock painting

I want to hit the canvas

I want to be bright – dripping with life

I want to run off the sheet and soak the floorboards

I want to cake around the edges

And I want to die in Upstate New York


I want to twist in the vineyards

I want to swirl from post to post – vine to vine – round and round

I want to feel the cool grass on my feet

I want to wear a crown of trees

I want to trace the Hudson River with a giant’s hand


I want to sit at the top of Alster Tower on a lonely night


I want to walk the grounds of Heart Island

I want to gaze up at the night clouds forming like praying hands

I want to look up at the stained glass from the floor of Boldt Castle


I want to die in Upstate New York

Preferably in the fall

When the red drips off the foliage and spills into still waters

Shaking outward


I want to be held over them lakes in a painter’s hand

Carefully dropped from an emotional brow


I want to be the country road that drives off into nothing

I want to be big for once


I want to be as lonely as Halcyon Hall

A peaceful affirmed lonely

I want to be the leaves that live in that old building

I want to sit in the dining hall

You could join me and we could be lonely together

We could be music – wind

We could bounce about the joists


The world spins, do you think it is possible it lays down?


I walk out onto the lawn

You beside me

I stand on the verdant hillock

The moon is still mysterious


I love to dream under her

Is it weird she is my anchor?

ɹoɥɔuɐ uʍop ǝpᴉsdn ʎW


She waves on the fields

There are no screams here


We are the buds in the Catskill, lover

The red roofs at Mohonk Mountain House

We can be anything in transcendence


I want to die in Upstate New York

I want you to meet me so we can explore

I want to live like a Pollock painting

Bright splashes on the canvas


I want to be lonely

Gracefully lonely

Just lonely

With you lonely


Come whistle through Howe Caverns

Through the stalagmite teeth

Let’s be potholes in the rock


Let’s be the Thousand Islands

Or sit on the sand beach of “Just Enough Room”

I’m lonesome to be lonesome with you


I’m lonesome to be lonely with you

For our colors to cross

For our ribbons to tangle – I have always been faithless

But I’ll forever be lonesome to be lonely with you

And so, the Moon’s my angel


I sit lonely in the water

I am a castle in the fog

I am fear in a box

You’re a wind over the ocean

You’re a visiting superstition

You’re a tail I follow out

I want to die in Upstate New York

I want our ribbons to tangle

Remember that time on the highway?

Driving through heaven

A dipped crown in the mountains

Crying under a golden sky

God’s too big, gods too big for us

And so, the Moon’s my angel

I’ve been running behind her

Catching whatever she throws

I want our colors to cross

I want our ribbons to tangle

I am lonely for the farmland


I’m an empty concert hall

No harmony in the walls

I am lonely

Love disguise of disappointment

My hearts a colorful balloon

Floating over a waterfall

All this light inside me

My body’s a temple, a shrine to you

in blue water

All the eyes in the city can’t match yours

Line’s of an artist, the colors of harvest

The new kicks of spring, when clouds march through the valley

The trees watch their soldiers come home


We are lights in motion

Red and white

Your legs near the exhaust pipe

Sitting on a big life

A faint glowing license plate of a sky

Where the numbers half shine

You’re the juiciness of a big lie

I sketch totems on the wall

Cool water rhythms and salt

Two birds dodging stones

We came from loving homes

Open eyed blues

Directed at the one you choose

I am sheets of rain

On your empty plane

A single window

An endless stare

A boundless wilderness

A green flare

Under bow and wreath

There I lay your setting leaf

An arrow guided to the Key

Same Key whom fell for Anthony


On the back of a bike

Sitting above a taillight

Looking backward at the road

As though you are falling thru the star lite


Empty palace checkered floors

A spin dive on to the nose

Opening like a rose

Light emitting from closed doors

Where whispers gather rise and swirl

Locked like a lover’s lips or curls

Zee motion tribal dances

Lips burn and lick romances

Signal fires carry calls and answers

Calypso myths

The rise and fall of earths treasure chest

Don’t hand yourself on your hang ups

Jewel studded dangers

Miss conceptions about crowns

Look to your feet it’s going down

On the back of a bike

Sitting above a taillight

Looking backward to the road

As though you are falling down a well


My hearts allowed to hurt

Tell me I can feel

I want to love you before it’s all over

Tangle tangle tangle tangle

Put your light on me

See me look at you

See me love you

This life they couldn’t prepare ya

It’s all about Sarah

I want to dive into a night sky

I want to see celestial shores

I want to fall under that big hand

With my hand in yours

I want a family album

I want to escape the fears of failing

Dive into a night sky

Thrive like a night star

I don’t want to question why I burn

An Upstate New York Night

Prices as listed (no substitutions)

10$ – There’s a frosty heart of a house

Where the love pours out

14$ – The island at the gas station hums

Hold me in a black sky

Lets be two moon slivers )) holding hands

The air hit me like a god hand

The air heard me like a good friend

Stars swooped like a swallow guarding its nest

I feel you like poetry spilling out of a brain

When you love you can’t miss

You’re like looking in on a party

You can’t hear the words but you can feel the buzz

One of these summers ill stop counting these summers

I’m just a dinosaur bone of a lover

I want to marry you again

I want to apple pick with our children

I want to die in Upstate New York

I had this dream where the world was really big

and we jumped from lilly pad to lilly pad

over the water and some people drowned

I don’t want to wake up screaming

I am lonely

I want our colors to tangle

Anytime we are frightened we can just tangle

You showed me the beauty in life

The sky watcher, the leaf peeper, the sun drinker

A role reprised

Meet me at the peek of autumn

We are what the white churches are supposed to mean

Jack-Ker-O’-lantern poem books glowing

The night like an ocean

Tales of the Rougarou still haunting

I want our children to love other people

And not fear strangers

To have hearts like a bin of apples

I want to show my children how to build something

How to run

I want to look through a wet window pane

On a damp morning

See the dots streaming down the glass

See the school bus in front of our yard

Raincoat yellow

Leaves in the lane

Sweat on the barn

Birds in the gravel

Blurred trees in the panel

Our grandmothers are here

I miss the smell of diesel

The lonely rows of the school bus

The hard, green seats

The backpacks and crumpled papers

I want to see it from my mom’s eyes

From the other side

Like peering in a bowl at a new pet

I found my life talking about how I’d die

The trick is you got to believe it

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